Shittens: The Mitten-Shaped Toilet Paper Alternative
When you’re sittin’ on the toilet and the paper is gone, be a man, use your hand… or get some Shittens! After all, protecting ourselves from fecal matter should be a top priority right up there with wearing sunscreen and planning for retirement.
Shit is gross. Nobody is arguing about that. That’s why it’s the star of biting zingers such as “Shithead”, “Shit for brains”, or “Eat shit and die”, so it’s really important to not get in your hands after after a hard and disastrous pooping session.
Shittens are disposable mitten-shaped moist wipes come in a pack of 20 towelettes, are eco-friendly and FDA approved for babies, pets, and adults, and each mitten measures 7 inches x 5 inches (18 cm x 13 cm) and can be purchased on Amazon… obviously… because Jeff Bezos owns everything and everyone, and he’s even ready to profit from stupid crap like this.
If you enjoy wasting your money on dumb stuff like this, also check out Poop Knife and Undies For Two which we’ve previously featured on this awesome site.
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